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A FREE SPEECH VALENTINE FOR MOM: Permission to Kvetch 10 ANTIDOTES FOR TOXIC TABOOS
Are you a regular at the Shame Shack? It's that all-you-can-eat smorgasbord of disapproval behind the paranoia warehouse inside your own Lizard Brain. Once we become mothers, some of us start hanging out there all day like judgment...
How Distressing is Social Phobia?
I remember a friend in college who would blush, sweat, and tremble when required by a teacher to speak in class. A few weeks before the presentation, he’d be anxious, agitated, and couldn’t sleep. Because I was still a student then, I didn’t have...
Kid Birthday Party Games - Under 10's
Party games is about having fun and keeping the kids entertained. Don't choose too many games that are only about awarding the winner - because then the majority are left out. Team games are better in that a team wins rather then just 1 individual....
So just what is this 'Americana' music?
Basically, Americana is Country Music. Hold on! Wait! Don't go
clicking away yet!
We're not talking here about the cliches of Line Dancing,
Stetsons and songs about losing Wife, Dawg and Car (not
necessarily in that order).
What we're...
Treasured Keepsakes or Clutter? A Look at Memorabilia
Handwritten notes, children’s artwork, report cards, ticket stubs . . . little tidbits of our lives. What’s worth keeping? What should be released? Only you can decide which items hold most meaning and importance for you. As you decide which...
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Grieving Children
While it is my belief that death is just one more experience to seek growth and soul development in our current physical forms, losing a loved one is never easy. Our family has experienced its fair share of grief in the past few years. We’ve lost my sister-in-law (my daughters’ aunt), a beloved uncle and a cherished pet, to name just a few.
I try to reassure my daughters that a loved one who has moved on is safe and happy, however, we still need to grieve and accept the inevitable feelings of loss and sadness. Loved ones will be missed. Opportunities to share life and experiences will have been cut short. They know that it’s OK to feel sad and to cry. As soon as possible after the initial shock and sadness over losing a cherished one has passed, I try to bring happy memories of the person back into our lives. It’s important to remember the love and lessons we’ve learned from them with joy in our hearts and with respect for the time we’ve had to share our lives in their company.
I tell my daughters that they can talk to the person who has passed on any time they feel like it. That person will now always be available to listen. We will still feel love for our missed relative or pet and we include the departed soul in our prayers until it feels right to let them go. We ask that they are well taken
care of and loved as much as we love them. This helps ease their anxiety of the unknown and allows them to feel that their loved one is in some way protected from whatever they might imagine exists “out there.”
I’m sure, among our readers, religious and spiritual beliefs are many and varied. It is our responsibility to help our children understand that the unknown is not a scary place and to feel secure in life’s mysteries. Even if you feel there is “nothing” after this life, children will benefit by assurances that they and their loved ones have a purpose for being.
As parents, we will be challenged to guide our kids through a myriad of life’s ups and downs. If we respect their limited understanding of the issues and guide their thoughts with a loving heart and acceptance of each aspect of life, no matter how difficult, we’ve done the best we can under sometimes-extreme circumstances.
About the Author
Rexanne Mancini is the mother of two daughters. She maintains an extensive yet informal parenting and family web site, Rexanne.com – http://www.rexanne.com -Visit her site for good advice, award-winning Internet holiday pages and some humor to help you cope. Subscribe to her free newsletter, Rexanne’s Web Review, for a monthly dose of Rexanne: http://www.rexanne.com/rwr-archives.html
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